My French woman, myself : five great ideas for losing weight

Mireille Guiliano's best seller French Women Don't Get Fat hit a raw (and plump) American nerve. Lucky French women! What's their secret?

Some insist that speaking French correctly is so hard that it burns extra calories. Others believe in the magic of red wine. And, of course, French women smoke, but it would be irresponsible to mention that, so better not.

Guiliano herself published a French Women's Manifesto which claims that French women eat three meals a day (basically true), that they care about looks, both their own and their food's (true) and that they don't diet (absolutely false). She also maintains that French women "are individuals and don't follow mass movement". (The guys in Mad Men couldn't have put it better.) .

But what if you are not a French woman? What then?

With eatfests Thanksgiving, Christmas, Kwanzaa, and New Years bearing down on us like a drunken 18 wheeler, evasive action is needed, now!    Here's my modest contribution...

FIVE WEIGHTLOSS STRATEGIES BY VERITABLE EXPERTS

1. The first, of course, is to become a French woman, not from the north, (where sadly they're as fat as Americans) but from Paris, where nervous ladies with the racy look of greyhounds, rush about on cruelly elegant high heels -- from kids to husband to work to garage (to get the car fixed) to grocery store, to psychiatrist to herbalist to lover to garage (to pick up the car) to kids and husband and dishes and laundry and sleeping pills and -- merde!, time to get up again! (Diet may not be the sole explanation for their svelte looks.)

2 . Change just one thing! Peter Bregman, blogging on Harvard Business Review's site, reveals that all diets have one thing in common: reduction of calorie intake. His solution: go simple. Figure out which single action will have the most impact and do that, just that. In his case, he cut out sugar. And lost 18 pounds. (see To Change Effectively, Change just one Thing)

3. Get really sick. Flu, malaria, dysentery--options are many! For that pale, Kate Moss look, nothing beats disease.

4. Give your food to your spouse. Or, lacking that, your dog. As they say, one woman's loss is another man's gain!

5. Eat only vegetables for dinner. No-one actually likes vegetables, though even the president of the United States cannot admit this (except for broccoli)

 Zucchini, cabbage, cauliflower, beets, green beans, carrots--I've cooked them all with love and my family still acts like it's doing me a favor to choke them down. Don't fight it! use it! From now on, dinner is Herbevore Delight.

Comments

[Samantha]

Jonathan, she did not say that all people from the north are obese. In fact, using your logic then you must assume that all americans are obese, which is also quite untrue. I'm an american attempting to gain weight for health reasons, and I know I'm not the only one. I believe she was adding some lighthearted humor to her post. We all make generalizations, and it doesn't mean every single person (like you have stated) fits a certain stereotype.

[elizabeth]

i am an american that recently spent a month in paris, living like a parisian woman: walking everywhere, taking the metro, eating wine and bread and veggies from the markets, etc. and i must say, that i GAINED weight! at home in the states, i largely eat vegan, but in paris, i had a lot more dairy and carbs than i normally do, largely due to the lack of alternate proteins, and all that fat gained on me. so let's lose these cliches that all americans are fat and parisians are thin. i am much thinner living in the states than i was living in paris!

[FB @ FabulouslyBroke.com]

I have never believed that French women stay slim just by being French.

All that stuff about eating 3 meals a day, a bit of rich foods here and there... all crap.

They may just possess a stronger willpower and sense of survival to stay slim to keep their possibly fat husbands from cheating on them even more with their maitresses.

Anyone can stay slim or svelte (barring a REAL medical disease), and stay healthy.

It's just a question of healthy eating, light to moderate exercise (I hate exercise so I just eat less), and not eating junk food or sugar.

Americans are "fat" on the whole and obese, because they don't eat good food.

They eat a cheeseburger with bacon and think it's okay "once in a while", but their sense of time is totally off, as it usually means once every 2-3 days!!! Not 2-3 MONTHS. or YEARS.

I've tried to gain weight (once, when I was deemed too thin by BF) by eating lots and lots of good organic meats, fruits, milks, etc..

Couldn't do it. Ended up feeling sick from overeating!!

Therefore, in my mind weight = combination of bad fats, sugars and processed food that doesn't make you feel full or satisfied.

And I'm sure the women from the North are fatter, but probably prettier and cuter than those super thin greyhounds you speak of ;)

[Jonathan]

"become a French woman, not from the north, (where sadly they're as fat as Americans)"

Wow, this is so cliché. I was expecting a litte better from this blog.... :-(

I lived 20 years in Lille. Sure women from the north may not eat salad five days a week. But saying that those women are all obese is just plain wrong.

Moreover, I'm not sure that food from the north is more unhealthy than eg. some pork meat (jambon de pays) you can find in other areas.

I agree that there are slim women in Paris. Those I know here definitely do diets and often skip meals when they're too busy to eat. But there are also a lot of fat ones that probably go to Starbucks/McDonalds that you can find everywhere in the capital...